If the shoe is too tight, it's too tight!

I’D wanted a pair of yellow shoes for a long time. I just could never get the right shade of yellow and when I did, the size wasn’t right. It wasn’t until the other day when we visited my favourite shoe store that I finally got my yellow shoes. But before the purchase was a whole lot of drama. As we walked into the store, one of the store attendants rushed to our service. She asked what we were looking for and I politely said we were just looking at the shoes. That was my first mistake, I should’ve just told her we were looking around and went to the counter when we were ready to buy. So when I made my shoe intention known, she asked what kind of dress I wanted to wear the shoes with.

I wasn’t looking for shoes to wear with a particular dress – that’s never a reason for me to buy a pair of shoes. I prefer having the shoes and then decide what they work best with. Shoes, I believe, make or break an outfit – you just have to get them right.The store attendant started pulling out all sorts of shoes for me to try on – even those that were not in my size. She played the “some are big cuts” ticket on me. I was slowly getting agitated because I wasn’t really interested in all the shoes she was showing me. I just wanted my yellow shoes, which at this point she had given me a mustard pair which was a size too big.

The store attendant insisted that was the only pair of yellow shoes they had and I should try a light blue pair. The blue shoes had a shorter heel than I’d prefer but the design was just right. I really didn’t mind the light blue but the shoes were a little too tight. My feet were never going to stretch that pair. I hear a lot of people saying “it will stretch with time”. Wrong. It never does. Never make the mistake of buying a pair of shoes that’s not your size in the hope that it’ll stretch over time. That will just cause you unnecessary chest pains and put you under pressure to wear the shoes simply because they cost you money.

And you know very well what happens when you wear shoes a size too small. If you’re lucky to make it through an hour, after another hour you’ll be walking like you’ve got thorns in your feet. That would be the least graceful walk ever – you’ll look like a new born calf trying to find its feet. Besides the ugliness of it all, your ankles are badly affected by the ill-fitting shoes. They’ll have to contend with so much pressure as you try to relieve the pressure off of your toes and heels. You don’t need that kind of drama in your life, really.

After the store attendant tried to convince me to buy the light blue shoes, I decided I’d had enough. This was not their money, it wasn’t their feet and they definitely wouldn’t be stuck with an ill-fitting pair of shoes. I decided to have a look around the store myself, and guess what? I spotted the perfect yellow shoes. The shade of yellow was just right and the fit was tailor made for my feet. I just thought to myself – had I not decided to have a look around myself and had I let the store attendant do the picking for me, I would not have found my yellow bliss.

Stop relying so much on the store attendant. Remember, they’re trying to push sales. They’re in business and they really don’t care what happens to you after you leave the store – well, most of the time. Be honest with yourself – if the shoes are too tight, that’s it. They’re on your feet and only you can decide whether or not they fit. The same applies with clothes; look at yourself in the mirror and decide whether or not that clothing item works for your body. Don’t let the store attendant tell you it looks good when the voice in your head is telling you it looks crappy. May your shopping choices in 2017 come from a place of honesty. Take control of your shopping experiences and don’t buy rubbish!    

A classic groom never goes wrong...

Sulumani Chimbetu and his new wife, Linda

So, Zimbabwe Dendera king Sulumani Chimbetu wore a yellow blazer over a royal blue waistcoat and a baby blue shirt with a yellow bow-tie to his wedding.

He has always had an extravagant taste in clothes – very flamboyant and flashy. I can’t say I was surprised by this look and I certainly wouldn’t recommend it to anyone else. I think it was a bit too much but Sulu being Sulu can get away with these sorts of wardrobe choices unscathed. Well, until he wore a Bluetooth earpiece and said he was just trying to spice up his look. I’ll take a pocket square or a buttonhole, but an earpiece, come on, whose call are you expecting to take while you exchange nuptials! Not shy from a little ex-wife drama, Sulu got married and if his wedding pictures are anything to go by – the man seemed happy – about his wife, his yellow blazer and his Bluetooth earpiece. Similar to Sulu, I saw one extravagant groom on Instagram who wore a maroon plaid suit whose white bold stripes made him look like a heap of Tshangani bags. You know those, right? The colourful chequered carrier bags used by cross boarder traders to pack their stuff in. But they’re not just for that.

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Whenever we visited our rural home, my grandmother, Gogo MaKhuboni would pack sweet potatoes, maize, ground nuts, round nuts and all sorts of traditional foods in a Tshangani bag for us to take back home. The bag is such a multi-purpose one people will even chide each other saying “You like things like a Tshangani bag”. That’s how this guy looked like – as though he was wearing a Tshangani bag. I wondered if his wife had approved of the outfit or he had been like one of those grooms on Our Perfect Wedding who want to surprise their brides with their outfits. That’s a risk no bride out there should ever take – insist to see your groom’s suit way before the wedding. Unless your groom is David Tlale or Craig Zoowie, please don’t take the risk.  You might end up with a groom wrapped in a Tshangani bag. Think of how disastrous your wedding pictures would be!

Wedding fashion has continued to evolve over the years. We’ve seen men getting married in African print Kaftans, Indian traditional dress – the Sherwani, military regalia and all sorts of styles you can think of. I won’t even start with the white blazer trend. It’s so over done! Every man getting married wears a white blazer over a white shirt and a black bow-tie with black pants and black shoes. Those who pair this with white shoes; I really don’t know what to say to you. White shoes with black pants are just plain murder – you can never look classy in that, no matter how hard you try! If anything, you look like Jojo the clown. Even Michael Jackson knew to wear black shoes – the shocks would be white but the shoes were always black.  

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I think my mother is right on this one; grooms should just go with the classic colour suits – black, grey and navy blue. You may think these are boring but they’re exciting ways to dress these suits without looking like it’s another day at the office. And trust me, nothing looks hotter than a man in a well put together suit. For example, you could decide to make navy blue the focus of the outfit or you could simply use it to accentuate another colour. You could wear a grey pair of pants with a matching grey plaid waistcoat, a white shirt, blue tie and a navy blue blazer, to add some vavavoom to the grey base. This would go very well with a brown pair of shoes, a brown belt and a grey, blue and white pocket square. Remember, detail is everything – you’ve got to accessorise. The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is the little “extra”, they say. Whenever you decide to go plaid, pay very close attention to the squares, the lines and the colours of your plaid piece.

Choose one colour from the weave of the fabric to accessorise the rest of the outfit. On the flip side, you could wear a navy blue pair of pants with a white shirt, a navy blue bow-tie and a grey, white and navy blue plaid blazer with a matching waistcoat. This is slightly flashier than the former outfit but it will work. The goal should always be to achieve a classy look, something flawless, easy on the eye and definitely Kodak moment friendly. If you’re getting married this December, there’s still hope for you. Do it right and believe me, you’ll still be admiring your wedding pictures 20 years from now.