“Never trust a man with bad shoes”

Photo Credit: House of Gentlemen

I KNEW a guy once – he was almost always in a pair of flip flops and it drove me nuts!

I don’t know if I had tolerated them better had his feet been kept clean and his toe nails cut. It seemed this was the only kind of footwear he knew. He wore them with a checkered pair of shorts and a soccer jersey or a pair of jeans and a checkered shirt. The flip flops went almost everywhere possible – dare I say he could’ve even worn them with a suit! I asked him once – what the fixation on flip flops was all about – and all he could say was “I’m a simple guy”. And indeed he was a simple guy. Simply boring if you ask me! I guess the flip flops said pretty much everything about his personality – I’m a simple guy who won’t put any effort into looking good which translates to “I don’t care much”. An aunt had always jokingly said, when a man approaches you, always remember to check his belt and shoes. He may not be rich let alone have much to go by, but a man who cares will always make an effort to get a good pair of shoes and a decent belt – even if it’s the only pair he owns. He’ll always make an effort to give you the best of what he can afford. Believe it or not, shoes say a lot about a man’s personality. I should’ve known never to trust this one and his flip flops! Men, I know you don’t think about fashion nearly as much as women do, but when it comes to your footwear choices, you might want to give it a second thought. Women can tell a lot about you by the shoes you wear. Even if our thoughts aren’t completely accurate depictions of who you are, this is how we’re sizing you up. The eyes might be the window to the soul, but shoes are the window to just about everything else. So you might want to take some notes. 

What you choose to put on your feet actually does reflect something about you, whether it be laziness (socks with slip-on sandals), obliviousness (untied sneakers) or keen style savvy (those trendy suede desert boots we love so much). If you’re sporting a fresh tanned pair of Timberlands, chances are you’re pretty ghetto – but in a cool, gangster rap kind of way. To pull off a pair of Timberlands, you’re going to need big feet, so you’re probably a big guy. Timberlands are classic – just like you, an OG who was listening to Biggie before he was Biggie. The man who wears boat shoes likes looking put together which means he probably takes as much time picking out an outfit as we do; ultimately, he cares quite a lot about how he looks and will care about how his woman looks. I’m an absolute fan of the Converse; I think they’re quite cool. A man who wears these is relaxed – an average guy who we’ll probably end up marrying. We like these shoes and we like you. Like a great pair of Converse, you are understated, complimentary and effortlessly fit in on any occasion. You can go to a backyard party or a red carpet event – either way you’ll enjoy yourself. There’s no reason to ever wear sandals and socks – choose one. All this tells us is that you were too lazy to take your socks off before putting your sandals on, which makes us think twice about your judgment. Maybe you’re an athletic guy who’s probably running from one practice to another, but that doesn’t change the fact you’re still wearing socks and sandals. The only person who could even remotely pull this off is Cristiano Ronaldo. Are you him? No, so take off your damn socks and make sure your toe nails don’t resemble the claws of a cat! When we eventually break up, we’ll be asking ourselves why the relationship with the flip flop guy lasted so long. If you’re wearing fancy dress shoes, it implies that you’re donning an expensive suit. And, there is nothing a woman loves more than a man in a suit, especially a luxury one. Cha Ching! No woman can ever say no to a man with a couple of dollars in the bank.