When in doubt, choose black…

THE mirror at the end of our hallway is a great buddy of mine. I never leave the house without consulting with her first although on tough days, she doesn’t always give me the affirmation I need. You must be thinking I’m crazy personifying a mirror right? I’m even chuckling at myself right now. But well, it is quite helpful. A lot of the times you visualise certain pieces together but they don’t make any sense until you actually try them on. Even when you do try them on, you’ll probably think you’re all that and a bag of chips until you actually stand in front of a mirror and realise you look crappy.

It can be a lot. Figuring out to wear can be a real roller coaster ride if like me; you’re serious about personal branding and care about how you look. On days when I can’t make up my mind about what to wear from just standing in front of the mirror, I take a mirror selfie.Yes, weird, I know but it helps to take a picture and see how I appear to others. Just the other day I was having difficulties deciding what to pair my new black and beige skirt with. I had worn a black blazer and wasn’t sure whether to wear beige or black heels. The beige shoes matched the beige on the skirt perfectly.

They also did wonders for my legs, if I may say so myself. On the other hand, the black shoes looked rather too chilled for the feisty skirt but they worked well with the black blazer. I really wasn’t sure which pair to go with so I wore one shoe from each pair to make a more accurate comparison and take a mirror selfie. At this point, you’re pretty sure I’m out of my wits, rights? So here I was looking at the mirror selfie and wondering which shoe looked the hottest. The clock was ticking and I was running late but I also didn’t want to leave the house looking crappy so I picked the black shoes.

Black is always a safe option, always. It pretty much matches with everything even on days you don’t really want to look safe. You really have got to be out of your mind to mess up any black fashion piece! Black nuetralises any over the top combinations. It will break outfits that are too colourful and help tie everything together nicely. If you don’t already own a black blazer, top, pants and shoes – you need to get to stepping and hook yourself up! Black is also a great colour to wear on its own; all black everything is elegant. I think it’s super classy although my mother always insists I need something to break the black lest I look like a grieving widow.

There are a couple of things to remember if you’re going to go for the black on black look though. Vary the fabrics and textures. Nothing looks dowdier than an all-black outfit that is all cotton. On the fabric note, make sure the fabric selection is season appropriate. A black wool dress will look fabulous in winter but out of place during summer. Silk and linen make it easier to pull off the all-black look during the warmer months.

 
When putting together an all-black ensemble, fit becomes even more important. Take advantage of the fact that black is slimming and have the clothes more fitted and flattering, rather than shapeless and drab. Accessories are a thing for me if I’m going to do black on black. Black is such a graceful colour which allows your accessories to pop and your face to glow. It’s always a good idea to add interest with accessories. Bold, colorful jewellery becomes the statement piece of your outfit. For me, coloured stiletto heels are the go-to shoe with any all black outfit.

It’s also key to make your outfit more dressy or casual with the simple change of lipstick colour. A little black dress can go from day with a light pink lip stain to night with a bold, deep red lip seamlessly. Once you invest in good blacks, you’ll realise you won’t have to spend much whenever you have an important event to attend. Just play around with your accessories and you’re good to go.  

Get some vava voom from a choker

 

I HAD a good laugh the other day when a friend sent me a message that read, “Dear Pattern & Style blogger. I’m a 28-year-old lady and my question is; am I too old for a choker? Is it so 2000 and late?” I thought this was quite hilarious of her! I’ve been noticing with interest how the choker has been trending of late but just thought this was probably not for me. For some reason, it just seemed gothic. I remember watching lots of movies in which girls in black chokers wore black clothes, black lipstick, black nail polish – pretty much black everything! I actually thought it quite creepy; I won’t get into whether or not this could have spiritual connotations.

Besides the weird feelings I have towards chokers, I’m generally not into neck pieces; a choker would probably make me feel like I’m choking. Get the pun? Also, chokers somehow felt like something a teenager would enjoy more until I saw a 40-year-old in a gold choker paired with a black number. She looked quite sleek and I thought to myself this is something that could definitely work. Anyway, my friend was asking an important question. Are chokers particularly age specific? No, I don’t think so. I think it just depends on who you are, what you like and how you’re wearing the choker. While I probably think it wouldn’t work well for me, the next girl could get a chic look from it.

I’ve seen some chokers that are really pretty on some people; it’s definitely something to try on if you’re experimental. Chokers are a huge trend right now, but definitely not one that we have ever seen before. If we go back to the 90’s, we can see many celebrities rocking the choker style but people have turned things up a notch this time around. There’re different types of chokers that could be styled either alone or in a combination with other necklaces. If you’re looking for an everyday choker, you can go with the minimalistic choker look because it’s very delicate, yet it can give your outfit a twist of elegance and uniqueness.

The minimalist choker is simple and can easily be styled with different kinds of clothes. Simply throw on a plain top with jeans and add a dainty choker to complete your look. If you’re sentimental, you could go with the choker with a charm that means something to you. Maybe a pendant you got as a gift or a motif that’s particularly dear to you like a heart or a butterfly. You could also go with a dressier choker combining the usual simple choker with a dainty golden necklace attached to it. This is the all-in-one look that will definitely make a statement to your otherwise simple style.

If most of your outfits are basic, you can add this “has-it-all” choker, which could be a combination of a golden chain with a shiny pendant and a velvety soft string that will perfectly wrap around your neck. A mixture of long necklaces and a choker is great for a sophisticated look. The mixing of different types of necklaces could be seen a lot among “fashionistas” but if you simply use your imagination and create yourself a unique combination of your long necklaces and one of your chokers, you could get a winning number! For example, take one or two of your favourite long necklaces and see if they go well with a choker.

If you have one of those basic black chokers, then you’ll definitely be able to design a distinctive look. Also get some inspiration from photos online and see how to mix up your long necklace with a choker. A layered necklace also goes well with a choker.This is an easier version because you don’t have to choose among a couple of necklaces that you have and waste time on wondering which one would be suitable for your choker. You can simply buy a layered necklace and match it with your choker to create dimension to your outfit and give it a personal touch.

GIRL, LOVE YOURSELF!

I WAS driving home the other day and couldn’t believe my eyes just as I parked outside our gate.

From my rear view mirror, I could see a guy and a girl – they looked cosy and I concluded in my mind they were probably a couple. It’s how the girl was dressed that I couldn’t get over. It was around 5PM and she had a towel wrapped around her waist, she wore an old light brown pair of pantyhose on her head and a clumsy white T-shirt.

I sat in the car for an extra minute as I got over the shock but before long, I was asking myself 21 questions as they walked down the road together. Where on earth was she going dressed like she just woke up? Had she even taken a bath? If she had, why was she still in her towel and sleep headgear at 5PM and strutting the streets like it’s nothing?

Was that her boyfriend and if it was, wouldn’t she like for him to see her dressed in some decent clothes with her hair combed? Here I was asking myself all these questions with no one to answer them. I watched in awe as they slowly walked down the road but purposed in my heart to never be the woman who gets out of the house let alone the yard after 12 noon still in my nighties and sleeping head gear.

I’ve seen in some neighbourhoods, women walking all the way to the shops to buy bread and milk in their nighties and I’ve often wondered how a woman who loves herself can do this. Some often say, “It’s just the shops, what’s the big deal?” Yes, they’re just shops but you have a reputation to maintain. Imagine the people you might just meet while you’re out there with a stocking on your head.

With some women, they may not necessarily get out of the yard in their nighties but they keep them on for way too long. At 2PM visitors come to your house and find you still in your pyjamas! Unless you’re sick and bedridden, there’s no excuse for you to still be in your nighties after 10AM and you still haven’t taken a bath. Taking a bath and getting into a decent set of clothes should be one of the first things you do even when you have nowhere to go. 

I remember when we were kids, taking a bath was such an occasion you wouldn’t bath unless you were going somewhere. My brother and I played outside a lot and wouldn’t get into the house unless our mother summoned us to eat or to take a bath. If bath time came up before 4.30PM, we would need to know why we were bathing. There must have been a destination requiring us to wear “town clothes” if we had to bath during the day on a school holiday.

This should never be you. A grown woman who loves herself will always make sure she’s cleaned up and well put together even if she’s got nowhere to go. Your spouse can’t even tell you you stink and need to take a shower because they love you too much and don’t want to hurt your feelings. Save them the hassle and do the right thing. Even when you’ve showered, being at home doesn’t give you the ticket to dress anyhow. Of course you won’t wear your Steve Madden heels and Levi’s jeans but do pick a decent set of clothes – nothing with holes or unsightly for anyone who might visit you. I know you’ll be at home and want to feel comfortable but comfort doesn’t mean you wear trash.

Invest in pretty “home” clothes like cotton T-shirts, shorts and airy dresses that will let you live. They’ll be comfortable and roomy but also give you that fresh “chillas” look when you get unexpected visitors. Nothing is as embarrassing as needing to shower or get a change of clothes while your visitors sit in the lounge waiting for you. Imagine that untamed hair being what someone experiences when they come to visit you. Surely, slay queens also keep it on a style low when they’re at home.

Maybe Zodwa just doesn't like visible panty lines...

Zodwa Wabantu

It’s amazing how whether or not one woman steps out of the house wearing a panty has been on the national agenda. South African entertainer Zodwa Wabantu has been all over the news because the government doesn’t want her to perform panty-less at the ongoing Harare International Carnival.

 

I’ve been trying to think how she became so popular in the country to begin with and now we’re so worried about whether or not she wears panties. It must have been her appearance at Durban July, South Africa’s premium horse racing event that really got people talking.

She wore a red dress with slits running all the way up to her waist. The bulk of her legs were bare for everyone to see but it was one curious journalist, I assume, who brought our attention to her undergarments. There was no way she could’ve been wearing lingerie under that dress otherwise we would’ve seen the seams of the panties at least. Her biggest mistake was probably then blatantly saying she doesn’t wear underwear at all. 

 

I think her reason was that she doesn’t like it or something. But we’ve also never verified if indeed she doesn’t wear underwear. No one has ever seen for sure that she doesn’t. She just said she didn’t and people’s imaginations ran wild. I’ve seen a couple of her pictures and videos and to be honest, she’s just a woman living her life probably with French knickers on for all we know! 

Maybe it’s such a big deal whether or not she wears undergarments because she’s become a celebrity of sorts but women go panty-less all the time. I’m not one of them who could walk out of the house with no undergarments but it’s actually more common than we think. And it’s simply because someone doesn’t want visible panty lines. These can be really distracting and I honestly understand why one would want to get rid of the panties all together. 

Visible panty lines can kill your vibe and you really don’t want the whole world seeing what underwear you have on. I know there are seamless panties, G-strings and all sorts of underwear that can help eliminate visible panty lines but these don’t always work. Well, they may work but like me, maybe a G-string is not your thing. I’d rather walk around with visible panty lines than wear a G-string! Hey, don’t judge me – comfort over everything.

Just the other day, a friend of mine was complaining about how the material of her dress showed every crevice of her body. The dress was pretty but it needed some smart underwear to be flawless. So she decided to wear her pantyhose panty-less and guess what, no one would have ever known she wasn’t wearing panties unless she said it herself. 

The visible panty line struggle is real. Sometimes you don’t even realise its showing. But it’s no excuse; you absolutely need to make sure your bottom is seamless before you step out of the house. You could put together the perfect outfit but it’ll all be ruined when you realise that your panty lines are visible through your clothes. Even though it happens to every woman out there, you should aim to avoid them as often as you can. It’s not that hard to do, as long as you know what causes them.

You can avoid those pesky panty lines we all hate by buying seamless underwear. It helps wearing thicker fabrics with more texture which help mask whatever lumps and lines might be lurking underneath. You could try layering with tights or pantyhose. A thin pair of tights or pantyhose should smooth out any lines you might have and they won’t add any bulk to your look.

There’s a reason professional stylists use G-strings exclusively. They might not be as comfortable as good old granny panties but they work. G-strings are not as bad as long as they’re not too tight and they’re not peeping through your waistline from the back. That’s just the worst! If you’ve ever been on a commuter omnibus, you’ve come across a woman sitting in front of you with a peeping G-string.

It gets worse when she attempts to get off the kombi or make room for someone else to drop off. Make sure that person is never you by ensuring your G-string isn’t out there for everyone to see! If thongs just aren’t your thing, try boyshorts. They go under the butt cheek instead of cutting across it. A little lace is also good for making the lines less abrupt and not so noticeable. Just make sure it’s a flat lace so it doesn’t look lumpy under tight clothes.

You could also get shapewear, which are great for seamlessly smoothing everything out. Whatever your choice of outfit, save yourself and the people you’ll encounter some visible panty line drama!