Who gets to wear a jumpsuit?

For some reason, I’ve never really been a fan of jumpsuits. They’re just one fashion trend I never cared much for. At one point, every Jane and Jill was in a jumpsuit but I just didn’t budge. Maybe it was because of the bathroom unfriendliness of jumpsuits I heard other women complaining about. Apparently, when you’re in a jumpsuit and need to visit the ladies room, everything has to come off. That alone just seems like too much admin. Maybe, I just wasn’t into the idea of how a jumpsuit doesn’t give you much room to flaunt a perfect silhouette.

You’ve got to have a body that looks something close to Boity Thulo or Minnie Dhlamini’s to pull off a jumpsuit. And I’m not quite there yet. Probably a couple more visits to the gym or a Banting diet could do the trick! Anyway, I think not everyone gets to wear a jumpsuit. I see the Sissy Boy jumpsuit range keeps growing rapidly incorporating stretch denim and leatherette jumpsuits. It’s tempting. Jumpsuits are now even coming in spandex with African print material trimmings like what the Khosi Nkosi brand is doing. But tempting as it may be, they’re great to look at on size 8 girls and model slim chiccas. I can’t say the same if you’re one of those gifted women. You’ve got flesh in all the right places.

Bootilicious, sexy boobs and shapely hips just look a little vulgar in a jumpsuit – especially if the jumpsuit is made from spandex or thin material. I really don’t think we should be seeing all your body’s lumps and bumps. We aren’t showing off our cellulite, why should you! Of course, this doesn’t really deter some. You’ll still find plus size women in jumpsuits. They’re backside protruding from one end and the boobs spilling over on the other end. 

And if they don’t quite have a flat tummy – disaster! It’s just too much to look at when you go mfamfamfa in a jumpsuit. To me, all grace and class is lost. Being proud of your body size doesn’t mean you’re confident enough to wear whatever you want. It simply means you appreciate your body size and know exactly what would look good on it. They’re countless fashion trends out there, the jumpsuit one just might not be for you. But, if you insist this is your thing. If from the bottom of your heart you feel you can’t sleep well at night without knowing you own a jumpsuit or two, at least think carefully about the jumpsuits you go for.

Firstly, think about the fabric of the jumpsuit. It shouldn’t be so thin to the point that it shows us all the crevices on your body. Go for a thicker material like cotton. This will smooth everything out. Alternatively, invest in seamless tights or tummy trainers. These will help create a flawless silhouette.

If you’re a little on the chubby side, avoid jumpsuits with pockets or pleats on the front. You want to go for something that’s easy on the eye. The less the detail; the better. You’ll obviously need a jumpsuit with a zip on the side and not the back. Imagine how much of a burden you’d be to others whenever you need to wear or remove your jumpsuit. 

You really can’t be enslaved by a piece of clothing in that manner. If your jumpsuit is too long for one reason or the other, please make an effort to get a tailor to size it for you and sew on a neat hem. Nothing irritates me like pants that gather at the ankles. If you’re not going to turn them up or in, chop the extra fabric off! Besides, when your hems are perfectly fitted, your shoes have the opportunity to shine. It would be such a pity wearing a pretty pair of shoes and have them hidden by excess fabric. It would be really sad. If it helps, there’s absolutely no harm in pairing your jumpsuit with a blazer. A blazer always gives a sleek finish to any look.